Seg 4: Talk Derby

Speaker 40s - 16.72s

What's up? It's your boy, the Ted Smith PERSON from the men's room. And did you know I have a podcast? Well, I do. The podcast. New episodes uploaded every Wednesday on the Odyssey PRODUCT app. Somebody out there deserves to be recognized.

Speaker 216.72s - 32.48s

And the men's room knows just who it is. So to you, we say, bottoms up, sailor. My tequila! You're the toast of our shots of the day.

Speaker 332.86s - 40.9s

Drink time it is, as usual, we head to Z drink, desk, and Steve a Thrill Hill to find out who are toasted. Yes, indeed, and today we toast Z.

Speaker 441.44s - 41.8s

Z.

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Not the letter Z.

Speaker 443.26s - 56.18s

The letter Z is not earned the right to be toasted. Out of one million words in the English LANGUAGE language, how many words do you believe begin with the letter Z? You've got one million words. How many? 1,500.

Speaker 356.82s - 57.8s

All right, what do you think of Miles PERSON?

Speaker 458.44s - 61.38s

Start with the letter Z? I will say...

Speaker 361.38s - 65.02s

One million words, how many? I'll say 220. 220. Mike, what do you thinking? 1 million words, how many? I'll say

Speaker 465.02s - 125.6s

220. Two 20. Mike, what are you thinking? One million words? How many in the English language start with the letter Z? I'm going to say 60. It's more than that, Mike.Give it a little goddamn credit, right? 426 words begin with the letter Z. That's about 0.42% of the words. And Z gives itself away to the letter X. Like, no, you take X. Come on, Z.He ain't getting toasted here, my friend. No, the Z that we're toasting is now the legendary North Bend Zebra PRODUCT. I don't know if you know this, but they gave that fourth zebra that has not been captured, the nickname Z. And at that point, when you're nicknamed a zebra, to me, that's its name because they can't tell you different. Anyway, is it Z or Z? It's, well, if you nickname is zebra, to me, that's its name because they can't tell you different. Anyway. Is it Z or Zed PERSON? It's, well, if you're in England, it's Zed PERSON.The Zed Smith PERSON. Still on the loose northman. Here's the thing. It's not for lack of sightings, right? So they have all these trail cams out there. People are seeing this thing every day, multiple times a day, and it's the best they can tell from the video evidence.Z PERSON is doing doing great man.

Speaker 3125.9s - 142.02s

Completely healthy. He's out there eating. One person said, well, we're a little concerned because we know there's a mountain lion in an area to which Zee PERSON said, brother, I deal with real lions. If I kick you, it is the end of your life.Z PERSON is still out there. Now, keep in mind, there are

Speaker 4142.02s - 170.68s

now people out there searching for the stray animal. Let's see. What do they call themselves? I can't find their name. But they specifically look for lost animals in the Cascade Mountains.It's volunteers on horseback. They've been trying to find Z. And they say, look, none of us has ever done a zebra before. So this is new. They don't know what to do. They don't know how to find this thing.They don't know what to do to attract it. But what's crazy is at this point, our boy Z PERSON, who I hope almost just stays free at this point, is an international superstar.

Speaker 0170.76s - 171.3s

Yeah, I'm with you.

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Live your life, Zee PERSON.

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And listen, North Bend GPE, hey, man,

Speaker 6174.94s - 176.66s

it's got to be the coolest thing that's happened to you.

Speaker 0176.72s - 179.42s

I mean, the only, look, you can be Enem Claw PERSON.

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There's a reason. No offense, Mike, there's a reason why internationally people knew about Edenclaw GPE. North Bend GPE, you're like, yo, we got the zebra. And apparently he keeps getting deeper and deeper into the national forest. Yeah.I think it's fantastic.

Speaker 0191.9s - 197.7s

Like I said in the office, it's a pack animal. But outside of that, it was already living in the states in Montana GPE.

Speaker 4197.9s - 220.54s

Like, unless he's missing his buddies, like there's plenty of vegetation. Like, he's good. And no natural prejudice. Just saying, Z. Keep doing the thing, buddy. Because here's the thing.People are more worried about Z as the zebra itself than they are about any damage or anything else they could possibly do. So, kind of a superstar, bro. Who knew? So to Z, bitches. God, what if he mates with a horse?

Speaker 0221.16s - 225.06s

There's like a whole new brand of, like, zebra horse. They have to have made it a zebra with

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a horse. It has to have happened, right? Is it a Hebrew NORP? It's a Hebrew. It's a Hebrew. What are that

Speaker 0233.78s - 240.4s

Zorse? It's a source. So, in honor of Zee PERSON, we pour this booze and we drink this booze

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because we think it's yummy. So over the tongue and down the throat to party

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in our tummies.

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Down the hola, bijola.

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Yeah, they actually can't made.

Speaker 3251.88s - 253.92s

Oh yeah, it's called a Zorse. Are you

Speaker 6253.92s - 256s

serious? A Zorse is the offspring of

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a zebra stallion and a horseman.

Speaker 5258.28s - 260.2s

Oh, about to get some Zorses and Northmen PRODUCT.

Speaker 4260.68s - 261.9s

They also call them Zebroids.

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Zebroids? Well, let's drink for that.

Speaker 2264.52s - 272.76s

You know it's bad Choice Friday. It's drink for that. You know it's bad choice Friday. It's Bad Choice Friday. You know it's bad Choice Friday. Hey, man, this is your fault.

Speaker 4272.92s - 284.92s

We celebrate the weekends on a Bad Choice Friday. Obviously, tomorrow is May the 4th, as in May the 4th be with you. It is Star Wars Day. So we took the Star Wars theme from Mecco ORG, the disco group that took all...

Speaker 5284.92s - 296.56s

There's no other description. Against the champs and tequila. Mike, how was the voted? This was the closest matchup that we've had in a while. 50.5% is the winner against 49.5.

Speaker 4296.92s - 305.64s

And the thing of it is that even though we're all going to be drinking, what comes first, and that is May the 4th. It's some Star Wars time for a minute. Oh, no way.

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Mecca GPE won. Oh, wow.

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Poo! Poo! Poo!

Speaker 3309s - 310.08s

Welcome to the weekend.

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You're listening to the men's room. 99.9 KISW, Seattle GPE.

Speaker 0315.2s - 407.74s

Congratulations to the winners of the 2024 Golden Environmental Prize WORK_OF_ART, the world's foremost award honoring grassroots environmental activists. Each year, the Goldman Prize is awarded to environmental champions from six continental regions around the world, celebrating ordinary people who take extraordinary actions to protect our planet. Discover the stories of this year's Goldman Prize WORK_OF_ART winners at Goldmanprise.org. Have you ever covered a carpet stain with a rug?Ignored a leaky faucet? Pretended your half-painted living room is supposed to look that way. Well, you're not alone. We've all got unfinished home projects. Whether it's a door that sticks or a disorganized closet or an AC unit that only works half the time.It all matters. You just haven't taken care of it yet. But there's an easier way. Just download the Thumbtack ORG app. You can search for what you need done and find tons of highly rated pros right in your neighborhood.Check prices, reviews, and book a pro right on the spot. Plus, you'll know what to tackle next. Because Thumbtack ORG is the app that shows you what to do, who to hire, and when. Pull out your phone, and in just a few taps, say goodbye to all those unfinished home projects, and say hello to caring for your home the easier way. Download Thumbtack and start a project today. 99.9.9 KISW.

Speaker 7408s - 412.06s

We return to the men's room with Miles and Thrill PERSON. Ah!

Speaker 2412.24s - 413.94s

Yeah!

Speaker 3414.72s - 429.94s

That is my entrance song when I joined the UFC ORG, baby. Positive Friday. Positive. Yeah! I feel good. Now, for all TV news all the time. It's time Yeah! I feel good. Now for all TV, it is all the time, and it's time for TV time with Ted PERSON.

Speaker 6430.18s - 440.7s

And now, because your pathetic life is confined to countless hours in front of a talking box, the men's room presents. TV time with Ted PERSON.

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Top that.

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What are you going to do now?

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I'm going to beat that one.

Speaker 3451.94s - 455.18s

The choices today are the jimmies. Fallon and Kimmel PERSON.

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All right. Seth Byer.

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People listen to me the replay are not going to get one of the episode down or not.

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I know.

Speaker 5459.96s - 460.34s

It's fine.

Speaker 3461.12s - 462.9s

Seth Byer, Stephen Colbert PERSON.

Speaker 4463.26s - 464.46s

Oh, Bear PERSON.

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Or Ted Smith PERSON.

Speaker 4467.54s - 470.68s

Is it 10 or is it late?

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Oh.

Speaker 3473.06s - 473.54s

It is right.

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The title, you guys have talented teams of writers.

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Helps it go up to their monologs each and every night.

Speaker 2478.04s - 481.74s

It is up to you to determine is this an actual late night joking from whom?

Speaker 3482.06s - 483.6s

Or could it be a the Ted Smith PERSON original?

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Feels like a Friday in here.

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Actually, I am pumped, man.

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Star Wars WORK_OF_ART.

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I'm going to dogs after dark.

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Pumped.

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Do you know the way?

Speaker 5493.52s - 493.82s

Airbnb ORG.

Speaker 3494.6s - 498.98s

Airbnb released a new category called Icon PRODUCT,

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which allows travelers to rent Carl PERSON's

Speaker 0501.44s - 504.68s

house from Pixar film Up WORK_OF_ART.

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And it was recreated by room, which was recreated room by room.

Speaker 5510.12s - 513.32s

So of all the wonderful worlds Pixar ORG has created for us,

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Airbnb ORG is letting you stay in grieving widower's house. Fallon PERSON. I hope that you did.

Speaker 1522.28s - 522.96s

Corpare ORG.

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Airbnb just released a new category called Icons PRODUCT, which will allow travelers to rent Carl's house from the Pixar film Up WORK_OF_ART, which was recreated room by room. So of all the wonderful worlds Pixar ORG is created for us, Airbnb ORG is letting you and your family stay in grieving widower's house. That's a good call.

Speaker 5542.64s - 550.1s

There's a lot of houses in Pixar ORG lore. But the Uphouse is definitely famous, but that is a sad, sad house. That's a good call. There's a lot of houses in Pixar lore. But the uphouse is definitely famous, but that is a sad, sad house.

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No Pixar ORG movie made me cheer up in the first three minutes.

Speaker 5554.04s - 555.02s

Did you actually tear up with that one?

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Dude, I did.

Speaker 5556.18s - 562.36s

I did not. Everyone said, watched the movie. If you haven't seen it, I won't say anything, but I'm not sure I'll watch it. My God.

Speaker 4562.82s - 565.12s

About three minutes in, Jesus Christ PERSON, I don't know.

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It took the Disney ORG formula, man.

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Somebody's got to die.

Speaker 0568.76s - 571.66s

100%. Two minutes in. It's the Bandy formula. KFC is

Speaker 4571.66s - 595.38s

releasing a perfume. And if you fancy smelling like fried chicken, you my dear, you want to smell like KFC.You don't need perfume. Just see KFC. I had one drumstick in November, and I'm still getting followed by Seagulls. I don't say, Kimmel PERSON. Fowl.

Speaker 1595.72s - 596.18s

Cobert.

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KFC is launching a perfume.

Speaker 1598.16s - 600.44s

If you fancy smelling like fried chickens.

Speaker 4601.86s - 604.56s

You want to smell like KFC, you don't need perfume.

Speaker 1609.36s - 615.48s

Just eat KFC. I had one drumstick in November and I am still being followed by seagulls. If my grandmother had known this, she'd have been a

Speaker 4615.48s - 620.96s

billionaire when she died. Oh, they don't want to smell that fried chicken. Oh, children, come here.

Speaker 1621.48s - 626.88s

This weekend is the Kentucky Derby EVENT. The Derby is the biggest and most famous horse race in the world.

Speaker 4627.22s - 633.38s

And the one day a year where you get to dress up and get day drunk in a goofy hat. The Ted Smith. Come on, man. It is.

Speaker 6633.44s - 634.36s

Let her wear that hat.

Speaker 4636.5s - 641.88s

Maybe I'll put on a button up tomorrow for the Derby EVENT. No, you won't. You figure it out who you're betting on.

Speaker 0642.88s - 644.24s

We will get to that in a second.

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All right, all right.

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Catholic priests in Pennsylvania GPE was arrested recently after he allegedly charged more than $40,000 to immobile games on his church's credit card. Oh, that's what a priest has to do to get arrested. Wow.

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Seth Myers.

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A Catholic priest in Pennsylvania was arrested recently after allegedly charged more than $40,000 for mobile games on his church's credit card. Oh, so that's what a priest has to do to get arrested. Jesus PERSON.

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That's a pretty good joke, man.

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Sorry.

Speaker 4682.86s - 704.5s

You know what's funny? Throughout last year I did the same thing. My buddy had a, I have a buddy that has some people over for Kentucky Derby EVENT. Yeah. So I don't know.It's one of those weird things. Like I just, yeah, I'll wear like, not just, I usually wear air maxes or whatever everywhere.Like I'll put on a, like a pair of dressier shoes at a button. I'll be like, it's Derby Day. Do you have an outfit picked out already? I mean,I just,

Speaker 0704.62s - 710s

I just look like classic. Here's my problem with the Kentucky Derby EVENT. It's, and it picked out already? I mean, I just, I just look like classic. Here's my problem with the Kentucky Derby, and it's not a problem with the

Speaker 4710s - 754.52s

Derby. Coverage is all day, man, and it is kind of exciting. And this is the one time of year that all of us, at least in this studio, learn anything about horse racing. Yeah. And then in two minutes, it's done.It is. You got all the buildup. I'm dressed up. It'd be different if we were there. Be like, in two minutes, it's done. It is. You got all the buildup. I'm dressed up. It'd be different if we were there. Be like, oh, hell yeah. We're dressing up, man.Because you're there for the long haul. But like, I'm at home. I got a sear sucker suit. And for 120 seconds, I watch the race. Yeah, last year I also learned the hard way. Like, don't go crazy on the mint tulips.How many did you have? I don't know. They were flowing from a pitcher. And the pitcher kept getting filled up. No, I don't know. It was the correct answer.Yes. Yeah. Yeah. The next day, right?

Speaker 2754.68s - 755.36s

How many do you remember?

Speaker 0755.62s - 762.96s

Right. The next day was just brutal. I was like, oh, God. I'm not doing that again. Okay. What time did your day start?Oh, normal.

Speaker 4763.2s - 764.7s

You know, got over there around one.

Speaker 0765.12s - 777.86s

Okay. One, man. There's days where you will get smashed. And like you're saying, I mix drinks, which is we can all handle beer in this studio, for sure. But when you start mixing drinks, we're having a good time.

Speaker 4778.56s - 805.18s

And something happens where it's like, it is 7.45 a.m. And I must address this. I can't deal with this. And I must address this. I can't deal with this and yet I have to. Well, plus also like just if you can hear my voice, listen to it.Filling up on mint jolops and pimento cheese, you're not going to feel great in the morning. Did you find your pimento cheese? I did not find. I went to the grocery store this morning. I will find it tomorrow morning. I will find some pimento cheese. The second section I said it should be there. I went to the grocery store this morning. I will find it tomorrow morning. I will find some pimento cheese.

Speaker 0805.72s - 813.28s

The second section I said it should be there. I know. So we got some horses running tomorrow. Actually, a good field. Pup,

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ba, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo,bo, bo,

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if you listen to the show

Speaker 3820.44s - 833.34s

and you find that annoying, understand one thing. We do this once a year, well, three times a year, every year during the Triple Crown, I provide the horse hoops. And if you listen closely, they only have three hobs. And Ted PERSON does a beautiful.

Speaker 0833.44s - 838.5s

Every year. Take your bike, you got to get used to it. One thing about this race.

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That's the! It's a lot like the Super Bowl EVENT. So they start their coverage way early. Oh, yeah. And you're waiting and you're waiting

Speaker 6845.56s - 852.98s

like two hours early. They, oh no, the races at post time is 3.57 PM for us. It's four. But those

Speaker 0852.98s - 886.22s

started at two. It'll be 357. Do not wait until four. You will miss the race. But the coverage, I believe, coverage starts at 11 a. See, that's what I'm saying. There's also though, Miles PERSON, you've got to keep in mind, there's also a lot of races that'll be run that day at Churchill Downs FAC. So that's why they're all there. But they don't, but they don't,they don't show those. Because they do, they do they show the other races. Because you got to, like, look, you've been to Emerald Downs ORG.When you go to a race track, it's basically only about what, one, maybe two races an hour. Yeah. So it's mainly standing around. And they'll show those races for sure.But like, because there's other stakes and this and that.

Speaker 4887.04s - 902.8s

Also, if you're at home, if you have a group of friends, just put each horse's number, then put them in a hat, right? If you're going to bet candy or something, not money. And then when you pull up, that way, nobody can just pick the favorite. You just have to get the horse you get.

Speaker 6903.84s - 905.04s

My dad. Wait, what's the candy that you're betting? I'm just saying you can't bet money at home. just have to get the horse you get. My dad.

Speaker 4905.2s - 910.64s

Wait, what's the candy that you're betting? I'm just saying you can't bet money at home. So I guess, I don't know, bet chips.

Speaker 0910.82s - 913.2s

But to me, Reese's pieces or $100 chip.

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Almond Joy PERSON, you just hit the minimum.

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Dad, he's a huge horse guy.

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So he lived in Lexington for a number of years.

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His roommate, John W My Brown, Sr PERSON.

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was like a Kentucky GPE colonel, all that crap.

Speaker 0929.24s - 936.76s

So they got hooked up. And he's a huge horse racing guy as far as in Florida GPE.

Speaker 4936.92s - 954.42s

There's a lot of tracks. Yes. So they run the winter a lot. It's entertaining. You go there and do all that stuff. So he came up here.We went to the Belmont at Emerald Downs ORG. Oh, nice. Yeah. So he was in town during that. I'm telling you, he said, hands down, we have one of the nicest venues that he's ever been to.

Speaker 3954.82s - 958.18s

It's clean. The food's good. Everything's affordable.

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The access to be able to walk down, up.

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Yeah, I took my dad one year. He loved it. But yeah. And I was telling Mike to prove your point. Like, I took my dad one year. He loved it. But yeah, and I was telling Mike to prove your point. Like, rain or shine, Emerald Downs, this is opening weekend. But it's fun to watch Derby EVENT stuff at the racetrack. And you can bet.Emerald Downs ORG is great. I've never had a bad time. If you're really into it, you're probably already going to be there. All right.

Speaker 4982.22s - 1000.8s

So, Miles, you said you're taking Sierra Leone GPE? I am. That's a three-to-one odd. Oh, Miles, you said you're taking Sierra Leone GPE? I am. That's a three to one odd. Oh, because my friend's a princess of the country. Not the favorite, though. I think the favorite is fierceness at five to two.Okay. The horse I'm picking has pretty good odds, eight to one. I'm taking catching freedom.

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Catching freedom.

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Mainly because I want to scream.

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Freedom!

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Come on freedom!

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That's it.

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That's the reason.

Speaker 31013.16s - 1014.66s

Who else do we have?

Speaker 41015.98s - 1045.42s

Thrill, you look like a just steel guy. I'm not. Okay. I mean, do you want me to run down all the horses? Yes. Well, there's 21.I know, man, but there was one whose name I can't remember where I'm like, that's the horse. Domestic product? No. GDP? No. GDP?Really? Gross domestic. I know. Oh. Yeah, no. Okay.Uh, there's Darnage PRODUCT. No. Sierra Leone GPE. That's Miles PERSON's horse because he knows the princess.

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Mike's horse, of course.

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Mystic Dan PRODUCT.

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Then there's...

Speaker 51052.08s - 1054.54s

I will put money on Mystic Dan PRODUCT.

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Yeah, seriously.

Speaker 51056.4s - 1058.3s

Dude, that you have catching freedom.

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You have a catalyst.

Speaker 51059.24s - 1059.78s

Catalytic?

Speaker 41060.28s - 1060.4s

No.

Speaker 01060.64s - 1061.14s

Just steal.

Speaker 51061.82s - 1066.68s

So he's going to steal a race. Honor Marie PERSON. Oh, here's you. Just a touch? Yes. There you go. Yeah, that's the's going to steal a race. Honor Marie. PERSON Oh, here's you. Just a touch? Yes.

Speaker 41066.82s - 1067.3s

There you go.

Speaker 01067.3s - 1073.36s

Yeah, that's the one. Actually, a 10 to one odds. Just a touch isn't bad. Just a touch, mama.

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No calling the cops.

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Just a touch.

Speaker 41076.08s - 1093.24s

I am obviously a sports nerd. I go blue in the face saying this, but like this is a big weekend, right? Now, listen, I know damn well. Sinko, my overly doesn't have anything to do with him. It has nothing to do with Mexican Independence Day. But there's always a giant fight on the first weekend of May, right? So you have Canello fighting tomorrow night, who happens to be

Speaker 31093.24s - 1101.42s

Mexican. Redhead of Mexican. That's why they call him Canella PERSON. Cinnamon. And then you always

Speaker 41101.42s - 1107.2s

have the Kentucky Derby. We almost had a couple game sevens, but, you know, NBA ORG didn't want to play along.

Speaker 31107.44s - 1109.86s

But you do have a game seven in hockey.

Speaker 41110.28s - 1116.1s

As Miles mentioned, the Bruins will probably send the Maple Leafs ORG home again to cry in their maple syrup.

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Damn, man.

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It's a little rough out here.

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Biggest city in Canada GPE.

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Can't get a championship. Canada GPE can't win, man. No. It'd be like all of a sudden if other countries were playing tackle football and we can't win. Hey, look, man, being big does not make you good. Yeah.Jell the Rolls PRODUCT like BS.

Speaker 01134.1s - 1143.06s

They're almost like the Chicago Cubs until they won that World Series EVENT. Or the Red Sox ORG. Right, right, right, right. The story history of the franchise is amazing. They just can't get it done.

Speaker 41143.48s - 1152.4s

There's a lot of good sports all this weekend. Your sounders are in action Sunday afternoon. If you're like me, you like F1 ORG. The F1 ORG race is actually at 1pm

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on Sunday because they're down to Miami GPE.

Speaker 01154.88s - 1171.24s

Like I said, I'm just being making a joke because it's a single mile, but come on, Chekow PERSON. Also, some funny stuff on this weekend. I'm kind of looking forward to this over on Netflix, the new movie that Jerry Seinfeld PERSON just made about the Pop-Tarts. I heard that's great. Yeah.

Speaker 41171.76s - 1173.16s

Yeah, I mean, it looks good.

Speaker 21173.3s - 1174.06s

I saw the commercial.

Speaker 01174.24s - 1176.86s

I thought it was funny. Read different. Who, just see it.

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Let's see. What else? Saturday Night Live WORK_OF_ART. Mike, this will be good for you. I know you love Dia Lupa PERSON. Doolipa PERSON.Yeah. She's the host and musical guest. So you be good for you. I know you love Diyalupa PERSON. Do a Lita. Yeah. She's the host and musical guest. So you can look forward to that. I know.

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Is the spring game on?

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I don't know if the Husky ORG, dogs after dark. I don't know if it is. I'm wearing a lot of purple. I'm going to run over there as soon as we're done. I'm just fired up, man.You're coming off an appearance of the national title game.

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You should leave down.

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Get the hell out of you.

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Yeah.

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Go on.

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Get on a bus.

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Go on a bus.

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Go up to you, Doug PERSON.

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Say last, Prev.

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Say last.

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I think you should get out of it. Ted PERSON is out. Yes, exactly. We should be out of here. Let's get out of it. Let's go.Let's go with Ted PERSON.

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I'll handle the headline.

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You guys headlines? I got it. We're out, bitches.

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Have a great weekend.

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Headlines coming up next. The men's room returns with miles and thrilled now let's see

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what's happening in the real world all right here we go man following his GPS trust that

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it must be safe to drive into this lake meanwhile the judge says oh hell no your charges

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might be hard to shake in Iowa GPE dog and his best dear friend take a stroll downtown.

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Brattle party sees the weirdest thing at wedding reception. It's ever having hands down. And a man turning himself into police decides to bring his drugs in with him. It's time for your headline.

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Now it's time to hit the head. Lines. Here's my cock. It's a good bit, Miles PERSON.

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I'll tell you the rest of you. I know. It's a good bit. It's so stupid Our top story We go to the lovely worldOf the internet Where an unfortunate addition To a wedding Was worse than people thought A video is making the rounds On TikTokOf a wedding ceremony underway And the bride is making her way Down the aisle Over the top of the video Is a caption reading QuoteWhen your besties walking you Down the aisle And you realize That the cow On the other side of the lake Is in fact not a cow and switches frames to focus on said cow. After a short amount of time inspecting the cow, one can deduce that the caption is indeedcorrect and it's merely a person dressed as a cow chilling out in a field beyond the wedding. On all fours.

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Yeah, kneeled down.

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Almost look like it's like kind of almost the prayer position or what is that, this child's pose, I guess.

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Yeah, I mean, look, if you're going to pretend your cow, I give them credit, they went all in.

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They did. It wasn't for other people. Or maybe it was.

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No, it was not. That is, that is a cowman right there.

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All right. I was going to do this by myself. I didn't know there was a wedding.

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Sounds like someone got a bag of mushroom.

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Do you guys ever see that video of the guy that I think he got some sort of a Nobel Prize

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for basically immersing himself within mountain goat culture?

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Yes, I do remember that guy.

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He dawned himself like these odd little stilts that he walked around on there.

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And the anchor just couldn't get through us.

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Oh, Lordy.

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It's gotten a ton of traction online with the comments ranging between finding humor and the situation and sympathy for the bride because, let's face it, if there's just a dude dressed as a cow kneel down in the bag of your photos, that sucks.

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I have sympathy for him.

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Obviously, Mike, I disagree.

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He needs a friend. I disagree.

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You get the wedding day.

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You take your pictures. It's all this stuff. Right. But you still want a story. Sure. I would love if in the background of my wedding day, you take your pictures, it's all this stuff. But you still want a story. Sure. I would love if in the background of my wedding photos, hey, see that count in the background,they go, yeah, I'm like, dude, that was a guy.

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Do you remember it makes it funny? Do you remember the pigeons for your wedding night? Yes, I do. Okay. Trying to feed him, key lime pie. Yes.So he's trying to, the dessert was awesome. Okay. He's at a window in an old hotel, Sorrento GPE, trying to feed pigeons, all the leftovers from the dinner.

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Yeah, me and Castle ORG, we're like, whatever we do with these? We're like, let's feed the birds. Also, the birds came up and ate them. It was good. They're not stupid.

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At the same time, I would love for somebody at my wedding and be like, dude, I know you're doing your cow thing. Can you like do it over there? Like no disrespect.

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Dude, I wait for a half an hour for the cows to cross the street before I get to your way.

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Yes, you did. I mean, come on. Which I've never seen, dude. I lived in Eamcloth since I was five years old.

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They even have the sign.

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God.

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In other news, the judges making headlines for harsh punishment that they laid down. I love this. They were trying a man that had joined the NSA ORG, and within months of starting his employment, agreed to, and attempted to sell classified documents to what he believed to be a Russian NORP agent.Classified documents, you're fine. Yeah, right? Which happened to be an undercover officer.

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Thank God PERSON. During his court hearing, right. Which happened to be an undercover officer. Thank God. During his court hearing, he did plead guilty to the charges, but requested some leniency from the judge due to his rough childhood, PTSD, his self-destructive tendency. The judge responded with, quote, this was blatant. It was brazen.And in my mind, it was deliberate. It was a betrayal and continues to address the request for leniency by saying, quote, not no, not only no, hell no. The man now faces roughly 22 years behind bars.

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It's treason. You literally committed treason against the country.

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I think if you commit treason, you should be punished. Like, whatever you think about what's going on in the country, man, you still, on some level, think about it this way. Like everyone's mad at each other all the time because we're, quote, unquote, supposed to. Absolutely. And the one time that we all get together is the freaking Olympics EVENT. Go, you will say, right?It's the one time.

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So it's like, look, if you're going to try to undermine what we've got, and our system is fragile. Everyone's got to our opinion. We do the best that we can. It's complicated. When you literally try to undermine what all of us are here for, I'm like, to me, take them out to the gallows we can. It's complicated. When you literally try to undermine what all of us are here for,I'm like, to me, take them out to the gala's, brother.

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Bye. A lot of softies out there. Step up. I'm with you. Step up. A man in Iowa GPE who wanted to do the right thing and turn himself in left no stone unturned. He willingly walked into the local PD ORG and turned himself in on a second degree robbery charge, but things got even more interesting when officers towed and eventually searched the car that he'd used to get there, finding not only $440in cash that they say is commonly associated with drug transactions, which that's exactly what I thought.

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What I thought what I read it? It was like, you have cash. This $440 is usually associated with

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drug transactions. $10,000 maybe, $440 bucks. In cash? What do you mean is

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usually associated with drug transactions. I made cash guy. And to be honest, if another weed's legal, I don't do a lot of, quote-unquote, drug transactions.

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I just prefer cash. I'm going to justify my job.

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Right.

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I'm a man.

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They also found 20 pills, 3 grams of weed, 3 pieces of aluminum foil with burnt residue,

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two rolled dollar bills with burnt residue, And a rolled index card with burnt residue.

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I think I was doing a lot of fun stuff.

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Well, that part is on you.

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He's smoking.

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He's now facing other charges.

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But cash, like, hey man, some people like cash, it's quicker, it's faster, it's easier. No trail. Right.

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No trail. No trail. You can't go to the weed shop without it. No trail. Yeah, right. Just to give those stories left a bad taste in your mouth.Thankfully, there's good news. Over in Iowa, residents were treated to a Disney ORG movie scene. Kind of a light, good newsday. Multiple witnesses grabbed their phones and took video of a deer and a dog taking each other for a walk down the street and throughout the town. Not much is known about the duo or how they came to meet, but they seem to enjoy each other'scompany enough. They were both picked up by an officer and taken to a safer location with a dog feeling rather remorseful, but the deer apparently had a look that insinuated that he would do it again, according to the officer. Like,transport them to a place they can be comfortable, but like, their bodies. Exactly.

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Men's room sports, Mariners have begun

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their series against the Astros. Kirby gets

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to start on the mountain tonight. Gilbert tomorrow at 4.15 and Miller on Sunday at 1110 matinee, all on route sports, if you'd like to go check out that. Your Seattle Seawolfs are in action tonight as well, playing at home against Anthem RC

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if you'd like to go ahead and rugby on the night. They are. They're the best team we have in the city. Absolutely.

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I mean, as far as championships, still well, you might not know, but that game's going on tonight

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and Taquilla at 7.30. Go grab yourself from tickets. If you've not been to a rugby game, it is a ton of fun. And say hi to Rucky PERSON.

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That's the mascot. Yes. Go say hi to Rucky PERSON. Call them chicken. NHL playoffs continue tonight on TNT and Max ORG. Game 6 between the Conduction Predators with Vancouver leading the series 3 to 2moves into the Stars and Golden Knights later on tonight for game 6. Dallas currently leading that series 3 to 2 as well. The series between Toronto and Boston will later on tonight for game six. Dallas currently leading that series 3 to 2 as well. The series between Toronto and Boston will wrap up tomorrow for game 7 at 5 p.m. on ABC and ESPN ORG, with a handful of possible games later for Sunday as well, depending on the outcome of tonight. You've also got NBA ORG playoffs. Game 6 between the Cavaliers and Magic is underway, and that'll move over to the Clippers and the Mavericks game 6 on ESPN ORG,with Orlando and Dallas ORG leading their respective series. Action continues tomorrow on TNT at 5 between the Timberwolves ORG and Nuggets and possibly on Sunday if any game 7s are needed. And finally, your Seattle standers take the pitch against L.A. Galaxy this Sunday at 3.45 here at home. You can watch that on FS1 ORG as far as your weather.Clouds have already moved in and they're going to bring the temperature down to about the mid-50s all weekend long with the strong possibility of rain throughout the weekend. So enjoy that. That's it for your headlines with that. Mike Hawke-A-Zaghan PERSON. Enjoy the weekend and make a cassidia with chewy meat.

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Do both.

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Yes, indeed.

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In the meantime, well, we be all about this bitch. So until next time, please, do what you do best. And for Alitha PERSON's sake,

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stay beautiful.

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The men's room has been taped before a live studio audience.

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Wardrobe and makeup provided by Mantastic Limited ORG. This has been a presentation of the Men's Room Radio Network ORG. Oh, man! A double flush

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production